So much of the delight of porn is the fantasy, isn’t it? We seek storylines and situations that turn us on and tickle our imaginations, allowing us to transport ourselves into the scene and vicariously experience the unknown. As someone who has had a long-standing interest in spanking and being spanked, I realized while watching Pandora’s Birthday Caning, featuring Pandora Blake and Sarah Gregory, that of course spankings can be lighthearted and loosely structured, all while remaining intense and enthusiastically consensual. It’s sometimes easy to forget that spanking, both giving and receiving, can absolutely be a joyful, exuberant act - it needn’t be limited to discipline, humiliation, punishment, or the other more traditional tropes of the genre.
This spanking film shows how fun and friendship can be excellent catalysts to very exciting spanking and caning porn. If you want to watch quality porn films (and clearly you do if you’re here), palpable chemistry between porn performers should be a basic requirement, in my opinion. Even if the scene is less sexually charged, chemistry doesn’t fall to the wayside.
Pandora’s Birthday Caning is a refreshing film in that sense. There is no obvious seduction, no pantomime of desire. The genuine comfort and authenticity between Pandora and Sarah proves that two people having a warm and sincere conversation alongside OTK spanking can be immensely gratifying to watch. Pandora and Sarah are clearly very comfortable with one another, and that comfort provides a soft and stable grounding to this unscripted, behind the scenes porn film. In lieu of theatrical roles, we get to see sparkling smiles, shy eye contact, sincere compliments and genuine excitement about the thrills of discovering, honing and thoroughly enjoying spanking both professionally and privately.
I absolutely appreciate how genuine this lesbian spanking film is. It’s a conversation between friends and colleagues that creates space for casual erotic experiences to unfold. For me, being able to be a “fly on that wall” is not only intimate and fascinating, it removes the ‘fourth wall’ and makes the whole scene more approachable and accessible than more scripted and dramatic productions. While ‘amateur porn’ has a similar authenticity, a grittiness and realness, and also often lowers that fourth wall, there’s something lovely about watching a personal, candid scene unfolding between two consummate professionals like Pandora and Sarah, shot and edited to professional quality.
I love and appreciate when films can help give you a new perspective on things. In this case, Pandora’s Birthday Caning has given me a new way of looking at spanking that I can now take away with me, continue to mull, and incorporate into my own experiences and fantasies - which makes this film the gift that keeps on giving.
The adage, ‘Necessity is the mother of invention’ came to mind for me while watching He Wouldn’t Spank Me because I absolutely relate to the plight of needing a sound spanking and not having someone to give it to me. Pandora’s monologue that opens the video plays out as a tell-all of a dud of a weekend with an underwhelming spanko. Where he has failed, Pandora ultimately triumphs by administering an impressive self-spanking, complete with hairbrush and wooden ruler to round out the variety of sensations, sounds and marks.
I myself have self-spanked on many occasions when feeling dire and desirous of that certain sort of sting, when nothing else will do, when simply touching and thinking are not enough. I personally enjoy it and find it very different than being spanked by a partner. It’s a bit of a mind fuck to strike yourself in pleasure, more so even than being struck by someone else. I suppose it’s the dual sensation of one’s bottom warming and burning with each strike, in combination with one’s hand getting more and more fatigued.
Here are 5 things to consider if you want to try a successful self-spanking:
Nothing is less sexy than getting interrupted or having to stop playing because you don’t have the right toys or tools at hand. If you’re experimenting with self-spanking, plan ahead so that you have the privacy (if desired) and comfort, as well as implements, that you want and need.
If you’re new to self-spanking, consider it like any other private pleasure activity: it will be better if you’re good and ready for it. Do whatever you need to get in the mood, whether that’s watching hot spanking porn like He Wouldn’t Spank Me, or any of your other favourite Dreams of Spanking pieces, a sensual bubble bath, or getting turned on with your favourite toy(s).
Take it slow
A good spanking requires some warm up, so start with small swats and taps on top of underpants or light pajamas, playing with the speed, intensity and frequency. It’s not a race, and you needn’t have a goal in mind, simply try different things and pay attention to how everything feels. Once your skin is warm to the touch, try again on bare skin.
Variety is the spice of spanking
There are so many options with spanking: under or over clothes, barehanded or with implements, hard and punishing or soft and sensual. Barehanded, with a ruler or hairbrush, like Pandora used in He Wouldn’t Spank Me or a light shoe or slipper are great household items to try. Self-spanking is a great way to explore what excites you about spanking but stick to the meaty spots like thighs and buttocks. Avoid bony places like ribs and joints, your lower back and kidneys and your spine. Self-spanking is not for everyone, so if you try it and it’s not quite right for you, that’s okay too!
After Care is Self Care
Impact play, even if it wasn’t too physically taxing, should be followed up by after care, and if you’re self-spanking that means taking time to cool down and rest a bit when you’re finished. Cool compresses and lotion can be very soothing to spanked bottoms and a cup of tea or other warm drink can help you relax and unwind.
Although entirely different, without the ritualised connection of someone else spanking you, self-spanking can be a wonderful way to experiment with your limits in spanking, both giving and receiving. Much like masturbation can help us learn about our body’s pleasure at our own pace, self-spanking can be a great way to safely learn what about spanking you like or need. As with any pain or physical play, start small and work your way up to a pleasurable level of intensity, respecting your limits and playing within them.
Due to a server error many of the members only files on the site are currently missing. I'm working to restore them - they'll be back within 48 hours. I'll grant all members an extension on their membership as an apology for the hiatus.
There’s always something endearing about behind-the-scenes material. I’m rather fond of that photograph of Robert Powell taken during the filming of Jesus of Nazareth: the actor, strapped to his cross, is wrapped in a blanket and being given a drink and a cigarette by a crew member between takes, which deliciously demystifies the whole thing. There are some similar enjoyably fourth-wall-breaking moments in this excellent look at the making of Mrs Smith’s Method: Pandora strolling into shot in modern t-shirt and knickers to give a bit of directorial advice; the discussions over how to achieve the impression of an utterly frenzied birching of Amelia Jane’s bare arse without going beyond what would be safe, sane and consensual for the actor.
Mrs Smith's Method, released a couple of years ago, is one of the more ambitious and elaborate Dreams of Spanking productions. It pushes many buttons: sly pokes at Victorian moralizing, hypocrisy and weirdness, especially via Molly Malone’s fabulous portrayal of a thrashing-obsessed, for-your-own-good religious loon; the ritualistic elements involved in hardcore discipline, such as kissing the implement and thanking your chastiser, and the closing blissed-out, yielding contrition. However, seeing the cast interact between takes as themselves is endearing and a good reminder that, no matter how dark the scene you want to play out might be, it can still be enjoyable fun entered into with full knowledge and great enthusiasm.
I’ve recently been dabbling in spanking shoots again myself and, along with the indisputable fun it is to yell at a cute girl and spank her pert bum till it’s glowing and hot, the laughs and hugs and the reassurance afterwards that she enjoyed it, that it was fun working together, and that we’re all good, are as important a part of the experience as the actual scene.
Severe punishment, the sort that comes with a few darker overtones of wretched humiliation and the crushing of a free spirit, may not be to everyone’s taste, though it’s definitely hotter than hot for a lot of people. I’d have to admit that my own preferences run more to the knockabout comedy end of the spanking scene, so I probably like this making-of version slightly more than the original. It’s also a good way of showing just how much work goes into the making of a porn film that’s a little bit more ambitious than most, and would be just as helpful as a masterclass in making your own historical romp, should you be so inclined. Mrs Smith Behind The Scenes is certainly a terrific companion piece to Mrs Smith’s Method: watch them back to back, if you have a free afternoon. As to whether you prefer to tantalise yourself with the making-of and then watch the film proper, or enjoy the feature first and then go back and see how it was all done, that’s entirely up to you.
Nearly two years ago I wrote a letter to Dreams of Spanking explaining why, with great reluctance, I needed to step away from the project for a while. At the time I wasn't sure if or when I would be able to come back to it. It was over a year before I updated the site again, with a new, sexier queer spanking porn film co-created with Chelsea Poe and Courtney Trouble. There was another pause, and since February this year we've released three new scenes - one a month, and we have another one lined up for this weekend. It seems that one way or another Dreams of Spanking has wiggled its way back into my schedule - and my heart.
I thought it was time to touch base and let you know what's going on with the site, and what you can expect.
In the immediate term, there's a new update coming this weekend - one for fans of our cinematic Victorian epic Mrs Smith's Method, showing Amelia Jane, Molly, Adele and I in a new light.
Beyond that, I have ten new scenes edited - all they need is images and previews, copy, trailers etc. I've been having good success this year with delegating those sorts of jobs (thanks Zak and Violet for the fantastic copy writing, and Nimue for the trailers!), and I'm currently trying out different image editors to see who's a good fit. Once I've put the finishing touches to the team we'll be able to continue to keep the site updated regularly with minimal input from me; all I'll need to do is edit the films themselves, plus whatever promotion I feel like doing.
Those of you who have been following my personal blog and social media posts will already know my happy news, but it's just occurred to me that I haven't shared it here explicitly yet. After trying to conceive for a year, I'm now eight months pregnant, and absolutely thrilled to be bringing a new life into the world with my amazing partner Felix. Our baby is due in July, and I couldn't be happier!
As well as gestating a human infant, I'm also gestating a book. It's about what we do with the sexual fantasies we have that are in tension with our politics and personal ethics, and how we resolve that tension. It's non-fiction, combining autobiography, personal essays, and academic writing. I've got 60000 words of it written so far, two thirds of that since January. Book and baby are currently racing to the finish line; I'm well aware that I'll need to substantially revise what I've written, but I'd love to have a zeroth draft of the manuscript finished before I give birth. To prioritise that project, and look after my body in the final weeks of my pregnancy, I'm stopping all other work and taking a writing sabbatical from 1 June. It's just going to be me, at home, writing and getting ready for the baby.
Long-form writing is deeply immersive and requires far more of my attention than pretty much any other endeavour I've found to date. Loading the project in my head takes a lot of wind-up time (and energy), and once it's loaded, it's really hard for me to focus on anything else. It's not convenient for me to multitask, or interleave writing the book with other projects.
For the next two months I'm going to focus on writing - which doesn't leave much attention spare for updating Dreams of Spanking. And from mid-July onwards (perhaps later, perhaps earlier - eek!), I'll be a fulltime parent and totally unavailable for anything else for a while. I intend to ease myself back into part-time work gently once my baby is a few weeks or months old, but I'm not putting myself under pressure to do so on any particular schedule. So if I want to update the site while I'm on parental leave, having a team of people to help me do it is absolutely essential. I'm in conversation with someone about taking on a project management role, so I can hand over that final step of keeping track of everything and making sure it all comes together in time to deliver you regular new spanking content.
With ten scenes in the bank, it looks like there'll be regular updates for a while - which is great! However, I haven't committed to a specific update schedule yet. One a month would take us to next March before I had to edit anything new. I'll almost certainly be able (and want) to edit new videos before then; I have eleven other scenes filmed and waiting to be edited, mostly dating from before I called a halt to the weekly Dreams of Spanking update schedule in 2017, and Nimue and I are planning to shoot at least one more next month. (I'm eager to shoot at least one pregnant spanking film before I give birth!)
I was wondering about whether that's enough content to go up to two updates a month, but that would only take us up until the end of October - which would put a lot of pressure on me to edit two videos a month from September onwards, on top of my parenting (and other) commitments. I don't want to commit to a schedule I can't sustain.
So it will probably work out somewhere between the two - at least one new scene a month, perhaps one every three weeks if I find myself shooting and editing new content more rapidly than I expect. Members will, of course, get access to everything new the moment it goes live - follow us on Twitter, add this blog to your feed reader, and join our mailing list to stay abreast of new releases.
It's been a while since Dreams of Spanking had a regular, predictable update schedule. Feels good right?
Welcome Violet, who has recently joined the Dreams of Spanking team as a copywriter. She regularly posts erotic photography and writing and her blog Love, Violet.
It’s an interesting thing to look at porn that is “not my thing” and try to see it objectively. Not surprisingly, this isn’t an easy thing to do. It makes sense that we process stimuli we find pleasing more readily and more directly than stimuli that doesn’t quite float our boat. However, the photo gallery In Big Trouble is beautifully made and has enough artistic merit to stand alone, regardless of one’s personal tastes.
Porn is a faction of the overall canon of contemporary art, in my opinion, and I say that as someone whose education is in fine art and critical theory. Many people would disagree, but when the crafting and production of pornography is as considered as its themes and narrative, like the films and photos here on Dreams of Spanking, I’d be hard pressed to dismiss it as too low-brow to be art. In Big Trouble is a beautiful example of visual storytelling that is highly narrative, emotionally demonstrative and visually satisfying to the viewer.
I’m not privy to the details of the creative process or art direction behind a scene like In Big Trouble, but it’s clearly well considered with captivating details. The inspiration for this custom hard spanking photo story came from a client with a particular vision, based on tales of his ex lover’s accounts of hard caning and OTK spanking conducted at home in her younger years. He said,
“Her stories to me of being punished were always the most engaging when she was describing the more ritualistic preparations of being led to the living room, being made to assume the position, being told to lift her dress, being instructed to lower her panties, and then later being ordered to lay down over his knees."
So much of what is described and desired in this scene is internally felt; both by the client as he relives his response to his lover’s stories, as well as the actual scene as it unfolds, grippingly portrayed by Pandora Blake and Mike Pain. Nuanced focus, attention to detail, and the rich storytelling of photography allows the viewer to be transported to the dining room, where paternal hand and rattan cane befall Pandora's tender bottom over and over. I found myself holding my breath as I moved through the images, struck a bit dumb by the intensity and anxious discomfort I felt as the story unfurled. I could feel the heat of the welts, the humiliation of her bottom being bared, and the potion of fear and obedience she must have felt to be able to resist flinching, kicking or squirming.
The artistry of these photos is, for me, in the discomfort that they elicited in me. Not all art is pretty or comfortable. These images are striking (ooops, what a pun!) even though they are not what I turn to for visual titillation. How then, did they resonate so deeply for me? I understand the client’s desire to have that tension highlighted: to experience, indirectly, his lover's humiliation and fear, as well as the unquestioned power and authority of her disciplinarian. These are potent archetypes and themes, because of the power dynamics of the domestic relationship and the ritualised experience of punishment.
This photo gallery made me pause, examine and interrogate my responses. It made me reflect on the nature of the relationships and fetishes depicted and the powerful emotions they provoke. In short, it got me thinking, and it made me feel something. Although that is not the same as being turned on, I was certainly stimulated. And that, folks, is what both porn and art are meant to do.
POV porn films are a nicely immersive experience, though most of the ones I’ve seen in the past have been aimed solely at a male viewer. I once watched something that I’m sure was filmed by taping the camera to the end of the chap’s dick, which was a little disconcerting. Part of the charm of our latest film, Spanked and Scolded by Auntie Margaret, is that it is deliberately but not ostentatiously gender non-specific. Watching this video, so anyone who likes the idea of a proper old-fashioned OTK spanking from a dominant woman can feel that they are the one being thoroughly scolded, and about to feel that mean-looking hairbrush on their bare buttocks any minute.
Pandora, in her role as strict Auntie Margaret, wears a classy vintage outfit of frilled blouse, tight pencil skirt and wide patent belt, with a pair of deliciously intimidating black-rimmed specs. She’s also wearing vintage nylons. One of the nice touches which will thrill the vintage CP lover is the sound those stockings make each time she crosses and uncrosses her legs (and yes, you do get an upskirt flash or two of stocking-top.)
Something about this film put me in mind of my encounters with the Aristasian Empire back in the 90s: an all-female crew who were dedicated to vintage values, clothing, and domestic discipline: plenty of hairbrush spankings and stern lectures on it being for your own good were on the menu there. While I’m not in the least tempted to go over anyone’s knee myself, I enjoy Auntie Margaret’s classy charm, and the mixture of scariness and underlying mischief that comes across throughout. Her smirks left me wondering whether Auntie Margaret perhaps enjoys punishing naughty nieces and nephews a little too much...
It’s a simple premise, but effective: you-the-viewer know you’ve been bad and deserve everything you’re going to get, and the lovingly-detailed description of exactly what will happen to you and just how much it’s going to hurt, enlivened with various little mimes of pulling down your underwear and laying you over her lap, builds up the anticipation magnificently. It’s well-paced, with the tension increasing at a steady rate.
The effect on anyone who identifies as a brat or naughty little is easy to envisage. Go on, just think about how red your arse will get as you lie over Auntie Margaret’s lap, held firmly in place, with that wicked brush being wielded again and again, each stroke harder than the last one…
I’ve always had a bit of a soft spot for strict teacher/naughty pupil spanking scenes, and Even Teachers Make Mistakes pushes all the right buttons. There’s the décor – crossed canes on the wall, Union Jacks to show the upholding of Proper British Values, and all the rest of it. There’s Pandora’s choice of bad-girl attire – super short denim shorts, and a tight Ace of Spades t-shirt. There’s the ritual ‘Oh but Sir!’, and the ‘Don’t answer back, get those knickers down!’ And then there’s the caning itself, expertly delivered and beautifully paced.
I like it when scenes like this are done with a knowing twinkle in the eye of each performer. In this film, I love watching Pandora’s face as the caning progresses; her little yelps and gasps for breath, and the way she chews her lip once the pain kicks in. I know some people find school caning fare a bit camp, but my tastes have always run to kink that is fun for all concerned - and despite Mike's strictness at the start, this film delivers. I particularly like the ending, which I won’t spoil for you except to say that it’s probably not quite what you might expect.
Over the years, I’ve done a fair bit of school-themed play and, of all the spanking things I’ve ever done, for me school scenes always seem to tend to end up with everyone involved nearly helpless with laughter, even while there are also tears of pain from whoever I’m whacking. I love to elicit tears in a reaction to a particularly hard stroke – but laughter and tears are more closely linked than some people think. No one actually gets to the point of giggling in Even Teachers Make Mistakes, but I couldn't help observing the occasional hint of enjoyment or trace of a smile which didn't quite seem entirely in character. For me, these moments of joy bubbling up through the strict disciplinary facade of the scene make the whole thing more enjoyable. I also spotted what I reckon was a hint of imminent tears from Pandora - which I liked even more.
Both Mike and Pandora clearly know one another well and are comfortable working together; apparently Danielle K, who was behind the camera, is a friend of Pandora's who is new to Dreams of Spanking. On the strength of this scene, I would say she fits right in – it’s a beautifully shot short film. I’m tempted to go get my cane, now, and see if there’s a willing bottom available, so I can practice some more until my tramlines are as precise as Mike Pain’s.
After a quiet year, I have some big news.
I’m stretching my creative wings again with some new queer porn collaborations. Last weekend I filmed a scene with Courtney Trouble and Chelsea Poe with me and Chelsea performing together, which was a dream come true. I have a massive porn crush on Chelsea and we had so much fun. Our scene was (of course!) very kinky and involved butch/femme dynamics, spanking, flogging, makeouts, Chelsea making me squirt everywhere with her fingers and tongue (she kept asking me to cum on her tits, which I’ve never done before - it was very horny) and me sitting on and fucking her face with my cock until we were both drenched in jizz. Chelsea had to hop in the shower afterwards to rinse my cum out of her hair. It was so great to connect with her and I hope we get to work together again.
Courtney, who was our videographer, was so great to work with and made everything super easy. They were warm, sweet and welcoming, delightfully enthusiastic about my gender expression, and helped me get over my nerves. I stopped getting regular pre-shoot anxiety ages ago, but it was a bit scary shooting with two porn icons whom I’ve admired from afar for years. I’m so so glad to have worked with them both and can’t wait to release the finished scene, which is a collaboration and will be distributed through QueerPorn.tv, Dreams of Spanking and other channels.
It's coming. And so are we...
I recently received this glowing letter from a woman who had joined the site, and it touched me so deeply that I wanted to share it. This is the reason I built Dreams of Spanking. This, right here, is the reason I've done everything I've done.
This is the first time I’ve had the nerve to contact you, and I really do want to let you know how much your work has meant to me, and especially if you’ve decided that stepping away from the site is the best thing for you, I wanted to be one more voice telling you that the work you’ve done is incredibly meaningful and still having an effect.
Before I found Dreams of Spanking, I was aware of, though not at all comfortable with, my kink, and had this vague idea that porn was sleazy and not really something women were interested in. I did try a couple of other spanking sites first, and while it was super exciting to finally be able to do more than watch ten-second clips late at night, I always felt a bit icky about it –from a “there’s something wrong with me for wanting to be spanked” standpoint, but perhaps even more so from a “I really don’t know how I feel about paying for this material” – buying a scene described along the lines of “Blond hottie’s huge bubble butt spanked HARD!” didn’t feel like particularly great feminism.
And then I stumbled across Dreams of Spanking (and bought a subscription, and stayed up until 4 AM watching videos until I physically couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore!). And I found EXACTLY what I’d been looking for – stories about real characters with real plotlines that involved spanking! Content that was artistic and beautiful and brought to life some of my favorite fantasies (and introduced me to a lot of new ones)! And most of all, respectful descriptions that called performers by name and showed an appreciation of their work, and commentary and behind-the-scenes content that assured me that the performers were not only “not exploited” (what a ridiculously low bar!), but people who were genuinely into what they were doing, whose boundaries and limits were respected, and who had input into the scenes they chose to do. And all of that together made incredible art, art that felt not like “what the company assumes the average porn consumer wants” but art that was creative and expressive and fulfilling for the people making it.
And then I started reading your blog, and learned that a creative, articulate, intelligent, successful, poised, independent woman can like getting spanked, and there’s nothing about any of those facts that are not compatible with each other. And something inside me relaxed.
The last thing I wanted to say, because I’m aware that I’m really rambling now, is thank you so, so much for your focus on diversity in all areas, but especially meaningfully for me personally, for hiring performers with such a diverse range of body types. Your website shows SO many people with all different kinds of bodies and they’re all presented simply as what they are – photos of people looking beautiful (and/or hot, sexy, sweet, cute, etc.) – with no fetishizing size, no “how brave of x to be seen naked despite x,” no “real women look like x” – just gorgeous photos of people presented as exactly that. Thank you, thank you so much for that.